The night went by slowly; yet to Port, watching the road was hypnotic rather than monotonous. If he had not been journeying into regions he did not know, he would have found it insufferable. The idea that at each successive moment he was deeper into the Sahara than he had been the moment before, that he was leaving behind all familiar things, this constant consideration kept him in a state of pleasurable agitation.
- Paul Bowles, The Sheltering Sky
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Teacher don't you fill me up with your rules everybody knows that smoking ain't allowed in school
The Associated Press reports that Sheraton Hotels and Resorts are going to ban smoking in more than 300 hotels and resorts in Canada, the Caribbean and the United States. So much for the land of the free. What's next? Are they going to ban drinking? How about fattening foods? Knives kill people. How about we ban those from hotels? You'll just have to pick up that steak and gnaw on it. But WAIT! That could lead to choking, which is also bad for your health. So let's ban the steak too! What about the hotel swimming pools? People have been known to drown. We'd better ban those as well! You can't be too careful in a nanny state! I've never smoked a cigarette in my life, but I would like to have the option to light up in my hotel room if the mood strikes me. What say you my fellow travelers?
-- Haiku Hannah
-- Haiku Hannah
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
The Large Row-Mate Dilemma
As I boarded the miniature regional jet for my short American flight from Dallas/Fort Worth to Houston Hobby last week, I saw, with a sinking feeling, that the woman in the window seat next to my aisle seat was rather large. And as y’all know, those planes are like sardine cans, with small, cramped seats to begin with.
When I got to my tiny seat, the large woman announced that she had put her large bag under the seat in front of me, so mine would just have to go under the seat in front of her. Even though it’s just a 50 minute flight, 1 hour and 10 minutes gate to gate, and even though I may be 40, I still need my iPod, my PSP, and my Frommer’s Budget Travel and National Geographic Adventure magazines, as well as my constant bottle of water, close at hand (I’m not weird, just gifted). So I explained, very nicely and reasonably, that yes, I did mind if her enormous bag was in front of my seat, as I would need to get in and out of my bag during the flight to get my iPod, PSP, etc... After shooting me an extremely hostile look that was meant to change my mind, and after much huffing and puffing, she was able to extract her oversize bag from under that seat and maneuver it to a position somewhat between the two seats. I then realized what her initial hope had been—that I would just put my bag in the overhead compartment, as there really wasn’t room for any bag in front of her. Now, why she didn’t stow hers overhead is a mystery to me, because she never got a thing out of it. But I wasn’t asking after what transpired next.
Once the baggage issue was resolved, I was finally able to take my seat and get out of the aisle so other passengers could board. I reached for the seat belt and realized that the arm rest wasn’t down. I started to put it down, but the large woman wanted it up, I assume so that she could have half of my seat. I told her, again very nicely and reasonably, that I thought it was a safety rule that the armrests had to be down. Of course, I don’t know if that’s true, but I was trying to be diplomatic. She gave me another glare, but ultimately acquiesced.
For the remainder of the flight, she read her magazine with one arm stretched over the armrest practically in my lap and moved around constantly to show me how uncomfortable she was. I just tried to ignore the whole performance, listening to my tunes and reading about adventures that I wished I was on rather than in the situation that I was, while hanging halfway into the aisle on the other side.
So, High Flying Birds, how do you handle these situations? Should I have put my bag overhead to begin with? Left the armrest up? Made a big deal of her size and gotten the flight attendant involved? Called her names and shamed her into staying on her side? What would you have done?
-- The Commish
When I got to my tiny seat, the large woman announced that she had put her large bag under the seat in front of me, so mine would just have to go under the seat in front of her. Even though it’s just a 50 minute flight, 1 hour and 10 minutes gate to gate, and even though I may be 40, I still need my iPod, my PSP, and my Frommer’s Budget Travel and National Geographic Adventure magazines, as well as my constant bottle of water, close at hand (I’m not weird, just gifted). So I explained, very nicely and reasonably, that yes, I did mind if her enormous bag was in front of my seat, as I would need to get in and out of my bag during the flight to get my iPod, PSP, etc... After shooting me an extremely hostile look that was meant to change my mind, and after much huffing and puffing, she was able to extract her oversize bag from under that seat and maneuver it to a position somewhat between the two seats. I then realized what her initial hope had been—that I would just put my bag in the overhead compartment, as there really wasn’t room for any bag in front of her. Now, why she didn’t stow hers overhead is a mystery to me, because she never got a thing out of it. But I wasn’t asking after what transpired next.
Once the baggage issue was resolved, I was finally able to take my seat and get out of the aisle so other passengers could board. I reached for the seat belt and realized that the arm rest wasn’t down. I started to put it down, but the large woman wanted it up, I assume so that she could have half of my seat. I told her, again very nicely and reasonably, that I thought it was a safety rule that the armrests had to be down. Of course, I don’t know if that’s true, but I was trying to be diplomatic. She gave me another glare, but ultimately acquiesced.
For the remainder of the flight, she read her magazine with one arm stretched over the armrest practically in my lap and moved around constantly to show me how uncomfortable she was. I just tried to ignore the whole performance, listening to my tunes and reading about adventures that I wished I was on rather than in the situation that I was, while hanging halfway into the aisle on the other side.
So, High Flying Birds, how do you handle these situations? Should I have put my bag overhead to begin with? Left the armrest up? Made a big deal of her size and gotten the flight attendant involved? Called her names and shamed her into staying on her side? What would you have done?
-- The Commish
Monday, February 11, 2008
Movies to Set the Travel Mood
Before any big holiday trip, my destination becomes my overwhelming obsession. While I try to avoid eating foods indigenous to the region – a traveler’s version, I suppose, of no sex before marriage (why eat a beignet in Austin on Thursday when you’re in New Orleans on Friday?) – I do satisfy my voracious appetite for all things regional with movies.
Sure, the unending web searches and scouring of guidebooks are a given, but ramping up to departure I immerse myself in movies set in my destination. While some locations are obviously easier to find as movie settings than others, you truly can find movies set just about anywhere in the word. Thanks to Last Holiday with Queen Latifah, for example, I have my travel movie if I ever visit Kar Valy.
In just 10 days (but who’s counting?), I leave for Paris. Thusly, I am breaking out my repertoire of favorite movies set in Paris. Film snobs please take note, you can tell me about Truffaut’s “The 400 Blows” until you are bleu in the face, but I’m not interested in the “real” side of Paris. Keep your grey and gritty. I want sparkly movies filled with art shots and pretty people sitting in cafes or strolling the Seine. Given these general parameters and, without further adieu, I give you my current top five movies to get me in the Paris mood:
Amelie. A whimsical tale of a shy waitress set in the Montmartre area of Paris, famous for its artist community – Dali, Monet, Picasso, and van Gogh all worked or lived there at some point – and, of course, for the white-domed Roman Catholic basilica, Sacre Couer which sits at the highest point in Paris. French with English subtitles.
Moulin Rouge. This is definitely a Paris of make-believe and fantasy, but I don’t care! That's how I feel about Paris and it makes me want to sing! Starring The Future Mr. Clear Plastic Bag, Ewan McGregor, and a not-yet-botoxed Nicole Kidman, this is a cherry flambé of a movie that leaves you on a sugary high.
Mon Meillur Ami (My Best Friend). To win a bet, arrogant and friendless antiques dealer Francois must produce a “best pal” in 10 days. His quest takes him through the streets of Paris with a trivia-loving taxi driver. French with English subtitles.
Before Sunset. Starring Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy this one is a “talkie” to be sure, but all that talking is done while Ethan and Julie stroll the streets of Paris, linger in cafes, and even take a boat trip down the Seine. I never dreamed I would be recommending an Ethan Hawke movie, but that’s the power of Paris.
C'était un Rendez-Vous (It Was a Date). A short film made in 1976, it shows about an 8 minute (fast) drive through Paris at 5:30 a.m. It was shot in a single take with a camera mounted on the front bumper of a Mercedes-Benz (the director later overdubbed with a Ferrari soundtrack). Basically, it’s a race through the streets of Paris. Watch out little bread truck! You, too, pigeons! No waiting on your Netflix mail delivery for this one, watch it right now!
-- Clear Plastic Bag
Sure, the unending web searches and scouring of guidebooks are a given, but ramping up to departure I immerse myself in movies set in my destination. While some locations are obviously easier to find as movie settings than others, you truly can find movies set just about anywhere in the word. Thanks to Last Holiday with Queen Latifah, for example, I have my travel movie if I ever visit Kar Valy.
In just 10 days (but who’s counting?), I leave for Paris. Thusly, I am breaking out my repertoire of favorite movies set in Paris. Film snobs please take note, you can tell me about Truffaut’s “The 400 Blows” until you are bleu in the face, but I’m not interested in the “real” side of Paris. Keep your grey and gritty. I want sparkly movies filled with art shots and pretty people sitting in cafes or strolling the Seine. Given these general parameters and, without further adieu, I give you my current top five movies to get me in the Paris mood:
Amelie. A whimsical tale of a shy waitress set in the Montmartre area of Paris, famous for its artist community – Dali, Monet, Picasso, and van Gogh all worked or lived there at some point – and, of course, for the white-domed Roman Catholic basilica, Sacre Couer which sits at the highest point in Paris. French with English subtitles.
Moulin Rouge. This is definitely a Paris of make-believe and fantasy, but I don’t care! That's how I feel about Paris and it makes me want to sing! Starring The Future Mr. Clear Plastic Bag, Ewan McGregor, and a not-yet-botoxed Nicole Kidman, this is a cherry flambé of a movie that leaves you on a sugary high.
Mon Meillur Ami (My Best Friend). To win a bet, arrogant and friendless antiques dealer Francois must produce a “best pal” in 10 days. His quest takes him through the streets of Paris with a trivia-loving taxi driver. French with English subtitles.
Before Sunset. Starring Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy this one is a “talkie” to be sure, but all that talking is done while Ethan and Julie stroll the streets of Paris, linger in cafes, and even take a boat trip down the Seine. I never dreamed I would be recommending an Ethan Hawke movie, but that’s the power of Paris.
C'était un Rendez-Vous (It Was a Date). A short film made in 1976, it shows about an 8 minute (fast) drive through Paris at 5:30 a.m. It was shot in a single take with a camera mounted on the front bumper of a Mercedes-Benz (the director later overdubbed with a Ferrari soundtrack). Basically, it’s a race through the streets of Paris. Watch out little bread truck! You, too, pigeons! No waiting on your Netflix mail delivery for this one, watch it right now!
-- Clear Plastic Bag
Friday, February 8, 2008
Doing the B and B
For all our gal pals who long for the romantic weekend at a bed and breakfast, Chattanooga, Tennessee has an offering to satisfy most every taste. I know, I know, where in the hell is Chattanooga, Tennessee? Trust me on this one, it is worth googling to find out.
The Bluff View Inn located in the art of the Art District will delight the girly girls who can choose from a variety of rooms aptly named for local dignitaries and decorated with hardwood floors, Persian rugs, gas fireplaces, oversized jetted tubs, and the obligatory B&B focal point – really great beds. After all, it’s not called a “breakfast and bed. We stayed in the T.C. Thompson suite complete with a full kitchen, two fireplaces, oversized jetted tub, and balcony.
As always, breakfast is included in the room rate and it is worth every penny. The Back Inn Café overlooking the river is a delightfully sunny place for a leisurely breakfast that is not only delicious but presented so beautifully it warrants a moment of respect in and of itself. I can, however, also recommend breakfast in bed wth champagne and dark chocolate. What could be better than that for high flying birds?
Chatanooga’s Art District is a surprising hip and cool place. Stroll over to Rembrandt’s coffee house right next door to the Inn or hop in the car for a short drive to Caffeine. Rembrandt’s also caters to the chocoholic with homemade chocolates, pastries, and bread. High Flying Bird highly recommends taking your latte (or glass of wine) and strolling through the contemporary sculpture garden that hangs on the bluff overlooking the river.
Take your time wandering through the Art District which looks like a small Italian village until you come to the Museum of American Art which will keep you occupied for an entire afternoon. Dinner is available at either the Back Inn Café for fine dining or Tony’s, a wonderful Italian restaurant. Although the wait on a Saturday night is over an hour at Tony’s, serendipity bestows upon guests at the Inn the next available table regardless of when you arrive. We recommend the build-your-own pasta dishes. Choose from black pepper fettucine with spicy Italian sausage or the rosemary chicken ravioli with a gorgonzola cheese cream sauce. Either one with a nice Chianti in front of a roaring fire doesn’t suck, my friends as Evil John McCain might say.
Best of all, you can roll yourself back to your room which is just a few steps away.
The Bluff View Inn located in the art of the Art District will delight the girly girls who can choose from a variety of rooms aptly named for local dignitaries and decorated with hardwood floors, Persian rugs, gas fireplaces, oversized jetted tubs, and the obligatory B&B focal point – really great beds. After all, it’s not called a “breakfast and bed. We stayed in the T.C. Thompson suite complete with a full kitchen, two fireplaces, oversized jetted tub, and balcony.
As always, breakfast is included in the room rate and it is worth every penny. The Back Inn Café overlooking the river is a delightfully sunny place for a leisurely breakfast that is not only delicious but presented so beautifully it warrants a moment of respect in and of itself. I can, however, also recommend breakfast in bed wth champagne and dark chocolate. What could be better than that for high flying birds?
Chatanooga’s Art District is a surprising hip and cool place. Stroll over to Rembrandt’s coffee house right next door to the Inn or hop in the car for a short drive to Caffeine. Rembrandt’s also caters to the chocoholic with homemade chocolates, pastries, and bread. High Flying Bird highly recommends taking your latte (or glass of wine) and strolling through the contemporary sculpture garden that hangs on the bluff overlooking the river.
Take your time wandering through the Art District which looks like a small Italian village until you come to the Museum of American Art which will keep you occupied for an entire afternoon. Dinner is available at either the Back Inn Café for fine dining or Tony’s, a wonderful Italian restaurant. Although the wait on a Saturday night is over an hour at Tony’s, serendipity bestows upon guests at the Inn the next available table regardless of when you arrive. We recommend the build-your-own pasta dishes. Choose from black pepper fettucine with spicy Italian sausage or the rosemary chicken ravioli with a gorgonzola cheese cream sauce. Either one with a nice Chianti in front of a roaring fire doesn’t suck, my friends as Evil John McCain might say.
Best of all, you can roll yourself back to your room which is just a few steps away.
Indique, So Chic My Sweet
If there’s one thing for sure it’s that it’s tough to get good Indian food in the middle of the country, so whenever High Flying Bird heads to one of the coasts, we land at whatever Indian we can find. In Washington D.C., that’s Indique. With a décor that takes you to the balcony of the Lake Palace Hotel floating on Lake Piccola in Udaipur, and vegetarian dishes that are so light and delightful you won’t miss the meat, the restaurant (which does have plenty of meat entrees) is directly across from the Cleveland Park Metro stop on the red line. Absolute don’t miss: the mini-dosa first plate – lighter than air lentil pancakes stuffed with spiced potatoes and other veggies, served with several delicious chutneys.
www.indique.com
www.indique.com
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Essentially Yours
I’m traveling to Scottsdale tonight and packing for the trip reminded me of my list of essentials for any type of travel.
1. iPod – This one is so obvious, it’s almost embarrassing to include it on a essentials list. But if you are one of the five people in America who does not have one yet ---- buy one immediately. They are worth every penny. And once you buy one, you don’t even have to spend more money to fill it with something to listen to because (1) iTunes is a free download (2) you can add music to it from CDs you already own and (3) there are enough free podcasts (including High Flying Bird’s very own – available now for download on iTunes) out there to keep you entertained for hours. iPods can also be used to block out unwanted conversations with fellow travelers or screaming children.
2. hand sanitizer or wipes – Hello, my name is Hannah and I’m a germaphobe. Even if you don’t have my germ issues, you never know when you are going to eat some Cheetos or a candy bar (okay now I’m hungry) and need to clean the DEAFCON 1-strength synthetic cheese powder (mmmm, I’m definitely hungry now) or chocolate off your hands with no water available.
3. paperback book – If you are the type of person who doesn’t like to read, just leave now. Your kind isn’t welcome on High Flying Bird.
4. rain slicker – A rain jacket with a hood can be a lifesaver. It’s easier to pack than an umbrella and can be used as an extra layer of warmth in a dry but cool situation. A thin rain slicker helped me survive an unexpected drop in temperatures at a Rolling Stones stadium concert once. (My boyfriend Charlie Watts would have been devastated if I’d left early.) Another rain slicker saved my life during a trip to Jamaica one year during Christmas and New Years a/k/a “the rainy season”. If you are one of those women who thinks she is too cool to wear a hood, you don’t need to be traveling and should just stay home in a climate controlled environment.
5. snacks – I always have some snacks in my bag. Candy, granola bars, crackers, dried fruit, peanuts, etc. You never know when you are going to be traveling with people on a totally different feeding schedule than you or when you won’t have time to stop in the airport between delayed flights and pick up something to eat or when the obnoxious airline will run out of the meals available for purchase on the plane by the time they get to your seat in the back of coach (not that I’m naming names US AIR).
6. True Lemon – I like to have fresh lemon in my water and in my Diet Coke. I’ve found a good alternative when traveling is True Lemon. It is crystallized lemon that is available in individual packets (www.truelemon.com). I wasn’t as impressed with the True Lime, but you might feel differently.
7. gum – Gum is always good for general breath freshening and to help with pressure problems in your ears on flights. In the immortal words of The Geek in “Sixteen Candles”, “Fresh breath is a priority in my life.”
8. cell phone charger – Don’t ever leave your cell phone charger in your checked luggage. Always carry it on with you. You never know when you will get stuck in some airport for hours or even overnight and need to have a charged cell phone so you can call your friends and family to bemoan the fact that you are stuck in the airport.
9. pashmina-type wrap – I love these things. They are large enough to be a blanket if you are cold and small enough to act as a scarf. And they fold up into nothing and aren’t full of germs like those nasty airplane blankets (see 2. above). If you are ever in Vegas, they have a kiosk in The Forum Shops at Caesar’s Palace that has every color in the rainbow, and they are only $10 each. I believe they also sell fairly cheap versions in some airport gift shops.
I hope my essentials list will help you in your future travels. In the words of the offensive redneck who taught my handgun carry permit class, “When the shit hits the street, you got to be prepared!!”
-- Haiku Hannah
1. iPod – This one is so obvious, it’s almost embarrassing to include it on a essentials list. But if you are one of the five people in America who does not have one yet ---- buy one immediately. They are worth every penny. And once you buy one, you don’t even have to spend more money to fill it with something to listen to because (1) iTunes is a free download (2) you can add music to it from CDs you already own and (3) there are enough free podcasts (including High Flying Bird’s very own – available now for download on iTunes) out there to keep you entertained for hours. iPods can also be used to block out unwanted conversations with fellow travelers or screaming children.
2. hand sanitizer or wipes – Hello, my name is Hannah and I’m a germaphobe. Even if you don’t have my germ issues, you never know when you are going to eat some Cheetos or a candy bar (okay now I’m hungry) and need to clean the DEAFCON 1-strength synthetic cheese powder (mmmm, I’m definitely hungry now) or chocolate off your hands with no water available.
3. paperback book – If you are the type of person who doesn’t like to read, just leave now. Your kind isn’t welcome on High Flying Bird.
4. rain slicker – A rain jacket with a hood can be a lifesaver. It’s easier to pack than an umbrella and can be used as an extra layer of warmth in a dry but cool situation. A thin rain slicker helped me survive an unexpected drop in temperatures at a Rolling Stones stadium concert once. (My boyfriend Charlie Watts would have been devastated if I’d left early.) Another rain slicker saved my life during a trip to Jamaica one year during Christmas and New Years a/k/a “the rainy season”. If you are one of those women who thinks she is too cool to wear a hood, you don’t need to be traveling and should just stay home in a climate controlled environment.
5. snacks – I always have some snacks in my bag. Candy, granola bars, crackers, dried fruit, peanuts, etc. You never know when you are going to be traveling with people on a totally different feeding schedule than you or when you won’t have time to stop in the airport between delayed flights and pick up something to eat or when the obnoxious airline will run out of the meals available for purchase on the plane by the time they get to your seat in the back of coach (not that I’m naming names US AIR).
6. True Lemon – I like to have fresh lemon in my water and in my Diet Coke. I’ve found a good alternative when traveling is True Lemon. It is crystallized lemon that is available in individual packets (www.truelemon.com). I wasn’t as impressed with the True Lime, but you might feel differently.
7. gum – Gum is always good for general breath freshening and to help with pressure problems in your ears on flights. In the immortal words of The Geek in “Sixteen Candles”, “Fresh breath is a priority in my life.”
8. cell phone charger – Don’t ever leave your cell phone charger in your checked luggage. Always carry it on with you. You never know when you will get stuck in some airport for hours or even overnight and need to have a charged cell phone so you can call your friends and family to bemoan the fact that you are stuck in the airport.
9. pashmina-type wrap – I love these things. They are large enough to be a blanket if you are cold and small enough to act as a scarf. And they fold up into nothing and aren’t full of germs like those nasty airplane blankets (see 2. above). If you are ever in Vegas, they have a kiosk in The Forum Shops at Caesar’s Palace that has every color in the rainbow, and they are only $10 each. I believe they also sell fairly cheap versions in some airport gift shops.
I hope my essentials list will help you in your future travels. In the words of the offensive redneck who taught my handgun carry permit class, “When the shit hits the street, you got to be prepared!!”
-- Haiku Hannah
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Tough to cope without some fine dining on your bottom of the earth trek? Kaupe you shall!
Ready for a fantastic small but elegant restaurant close to the bottom of the earth? Kaupe, located in Ushuaia Argentina, the southernmost city in the world is widely considered the best restaurant around. Don't let the locals wandering this hotspot convince you that this place ain't all that. The digs are in a small house with large picture windows overlooking the Beagle Channel; a little hard to find since it easily blends in with the surrounding houses, but well worth the hunt. Although this restaurant is expensive by Argentine standards, it is still a bargain for the traveling American looking for a fine meal.
Important payment note: Frommer’s review says the restaurant accepts MC, V, AE – not true. Almost all of Argentina is loyal to Visa. You can throw away your Master Card and feel confident leaving home without your AmEx, as long as you have a Visa. Further note: many of the credit card slips do not provide a line to add tips since tips are customarily left in cash only, so bring a little scratch even if you have a Visa.
http://www.kaupe.com.ar/
- Travel Monkey
Important payment note: Frommer’s review says the restaurant accepts MC, V, AE – not true. Almost all of Argentina is loyal to Visa. You can throw away your Master Card and feel confident leaving home without your AmEx, as long as you have a Visa. Further note: many of the credit card slips do not provide a line to add tips since tips are customarily left in cash only, so bring a little scratch even if you have a Visa.
http://www.kaupe.com.ar/
- Travel Monkey
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
World Series of Travel
Watching the Super Bowl on TV on Sunday night from my living room couch, bereft of company and/or party food, I suddenly longed for Andy’s Club at the Ramada Inn in Jasper, Texas.
Last October, I had to travel to Jasper, in deep East Texas. Jasper is known far and wide as the Jewel of the Forest. Guidebooks reference the piney woods and beautiful lakes in the surrounding area. But my fondness for Jasper is based on my visit to that hidden gem Andy’s Club the night the Boston Red Sox won the 2007 World Series.
When I opened the door to my room, I knew, with its green indoor-outdoor carpet, thin-as-a-blanket bedspread covered with yellow cabbage roses and leaking faucet, that was no place to watch a championship game. So I donned my No. 18 Sox jersey and trooped across the parking lot to the hotel bar, Andy’s Club, where the game was on the big screen, but the sound was down due to the live performance of the three-man local cover band that played there every Sunday night. I was warmly welcomed, with the bartender immediately exhorting me to try out the free buffet (three large pizzas in Pizza Inn boxes on the pinball machine). She brought me a Bud Light and introduced me to the other two patrons. None of them were interested in the game, but the second I walked in they all became Red Sox fans, including the band.
Not to say that any of the regular Sunday night bar activity changed. Lonnie, a chemical manufacturing company rep who was in town overseeing a bug-spraying operation, came in around the 3rd inning and ordered shots of Jack Daniels with Bud chasers. He was screaming “It’s all about the music” and bought the entire bar (all six of us, including the band) drinks several times before he called it a night. And the band still played its power ballads as if the bar were full. Although at one point they played and re-played the opening bars of “Is This Love” for an eternity until the lead man was satisfied with the chord progression.
I had only planned to stay for a beer or two, but wound up still on my stool when Jonathan Pappelbon got the last out in the 9th inning. My new friends were cheering as loud as I was, even the band, which had stopped to watch the bottom of the last inning. Random experiences like that are a reminder to slow down, spend some time getting to know people, and enjoy the adventure. And High Flying Bird highly recommends Andy's Club if you ever find yourself in Jasper, Texas.
-- The Commish
Last October, I had to travel to Jasper, in deep East Texas. Jasper is known far and wide as the Jewel of the Forest. Guidebooks reference the piney woods and beautiful lakes in the surrounding area. But my fondness for Jasper is based on my visit to that hidden gem Andy’s Club the night the Boston Red Sox won the 2007 World Series.
When I opened the door to my room, I knew, with its green indoor-outdoor carpet, thin-as-a-blanket bedspread covered with yellow cabbage roses and leaking faucet, that was no place to watch a championship game. So I donned my No. 18 Sox jersey and trooped across the parking lot to the hotel bar, Andy’s Club, where the game was on the big screen, but the sound was down due to the live performance of the three-man local cover band that played there every Sunday night. I was warmly welcomed, with the bartender immediately exhorting me to try out the free buffet (three large pizzas in Pizza Inn boxes on the pinball machine). She brought me a Bud Light and introduced me to the other two patrons. None of them were interested in the game, but the second I walked in they all became Red Sox fans, including the band.
Not to say that any of the regular Sunday night bar activity changed. Lonnie, a chemical manufacturing company rep who was in town overseeing a bug-spraying operation, came in around the 3rd inning and ordered shots of Jack Daniels with Bud chasers. He was screaming “It’s all about the music” and bought the entire bar (all six of us, including the band) drinks several times before he called it a night. And the band still played its power ballads as if the bar were full. Although at one point they played and re-played the opening bars of “Is This Love” for an eternity until the lead man was satisfied with the chord progression.
I had only planned to stay for a beer or two, but wound up still on my stool when Jonathan Pappelbon got the last out in the 9th inning. My new friends were cheering as loud as I was, even the band, which had stopped to watch the bottom of the last inning. Random experiences like that are a reminder to slow down, spend some time getting to know people, and enjoy the adventure. And High Flying Bird highly recommends Andy's Club if you ever find yourself in Jasper, Texas.
-- The Commish
Monday, February 4, 2008
Clarks Privo Opanka: The Ultimate Travel Shoe
While we agonize over maximum ensembles from minimum clothing (is this an "all brown" trip or an "all black" one?), 3 oz containers, and heavy coat vs. light coat, the most important decision we make before we get on that plane, that train, or that automobile, is which shoes we'll be wearing. It doesn't matter how thermo-correctly you've layered, if your feet are blistered and throbbing. Doesn't matter if you're stylishly black-turtleneck or stylishly brown-turtleneck for that one nice restaurant you've booked, if you're wearing white tennis shoes.
Before a trip to Barcelona in November 2006, I purchased a pair of Clarks Privo "Opanka" clogs.
And my travel life has never been the same.
I walked for miles and miles and miles in these shoes in absolute comfort. My feet are notorious for blistering and bleeding after long days of walking and exploring, as anyone who has ever shared a hotel room with me and witnessed the podi-carnage can attest, but not in these babies. It was like furry little cushiony kittens had curled and cuddled around my feet and allowed no harm to befall them. Plus, and here's the true highlight of these shoes, they have a slight heel to them so you can go right from day into evening without looking like a dorky tourist at the bar. I recommended these shoes to High Flying Bird before her trip to India and we now have another true believer.
But, now, the bad news.
These shoes were a "one-off". Clarks doesn't make them anymore. So why even tell you this? Because, it may not be too late. There are some online stores who have some left in stock. I have ordered additional pairs (they only had in brown, but take what you can get) from Footwearetc.com and I believe there is a store in New Hope, Pennsylvania that may have some but they do not have an online store, you'll need to call and order. There may be more hiding out there. Google Clarks Privo Opanka clogs. For the love of Feet, hurry!
-- Clear Plastic Bag
Before a trip to Barcelona in November 2006, I purchased a pair of Clarks Privo "Opanka" clogs.
And my travel life has never been the same.
I walked for miles and miles and miles in these shoes in absolute comfort. My feet are notorious for blistering and bleeding after long days of walking and exploring, as anyone who has ever shared a hotel room with me and witnessed the podi-carnage can attest, but not in these babies. It was like furry little cushiony kittens had curled and cuddled around my feet and allowed no harm to befall them. Plus, and here's the true highlight of these shoes, they have a slight heel to them so you can go right from day into evening without looking like a dorky tourist at the bar. I recommended these shoes to High Flying Bird before her trip to India and we now have another true believer.
But, now, the bad news.
These shoes were a "one-off". Clarks doesn't make them anymore. So why even tell you this? Because, it may not be too late. There are some online stores who have some left in stock. I have ordered additional pairs (they only had in brown, but take what you can get) from Footwearetc.com and I believe there is a store in New Hope, Pennsylvania that may have some but they do not have an online store, you'll need to call and order. There may be more hiding out there. Google Clarks Privo Opanka clogs. For the love of Feet, hurry!
-- Clear Plastic Bag
Saturday, February 2, 2008
VOTE FOR YOUR TOP TEN ON DA ROAD SONGS
You know the ones we want - the "get your motor running," the "oh-ah, i just died in your arms tonight," the "i need to know, i need to know, if you think you're gonna leave then you'd better say so," the "and the summer became the fall, i was not ready for the winter, it makes no difference at all, cause i wear boots all summer long," the "i've been every where man," the- well you get it. vote early and often by posting a comment, and we'll post the top ten for inclusion on your road tape, er, cd er, ipod.
Rebels Marching On Chad. Mr. Clooney, We're Getting Lost on What We Should Be Doing!
Thousands of rebels are marching towards the presidential palace in Chad. Under a 30-year-old agreement, the French military gives logistical and intelligence support to Chad's government, and France claims the rebel attack is an attempt by "armed forces from the outside" to seize power. Specifically, Chad's Foreign Minister has accused Sudan of instigating the attack to stop the deployment of a EU force which Sudan does not want in Chad because "it would shine a light on all the genocide that is taking place in Darfur orchestrated from Chadian territory." Apparently, both the Chadian and Sudanese governments support rebels in each others' territory.
Friday, February 1, 2008
Podcast Episode 2: Amtrak Cross Country with Katsy
Katsy joins High Flying Bird to give us the low-down on the cross country train trip. Come on, you know you've always wanted to go cross country. Here's your chance to learn how to do it within your budget and time constraints.
Oh Electric Car - Ou Etes Vous?
Exxon Mobil Corp. has just cleared the largest annual profit by a U.S. company — $40.6 billion.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Pie in Old Blighty
Today is National Pie Day. Not that I ever need incentive to think about pie, but this sanctioned celebration of all things pie got me to pondering the best pie I've ever had.
How would I decide? I love pies. All sorts of pies. If given a choice between pie and cake, I will always take the pie. Sifting through memories of flaky crusts (or maybe dutch crumbles), coconut creams and sweet-tart cherries, my decision was much easier than I had imagined. The best pie I ever had was in early September 2001 in London, England. Traveling alone, and having walked until I was exhausted, it was dark, and I was lost. A warm glow from down the street led me to a neighborhood (unknown) restaurant. Not a pint-filled pub of my colonist dream, just a (very) plain neighborhood restaurant.
There it was on the laminated menu. Apple pie. I'm always keen to not eat traditionally American food while traveling, but my blistered feet and throbbing loneliness demanded the comfort of pie.
It wasn't the crust (too thick) and it wasn't the filling (too gelatinous) and, although I did enjoy the pool of creme anglaise it was plopped on top of, it was strictly its state of pieness that makes it the best pie I've ever had.
The best Chinese food I've ever had was in Rome. But I'll save that travel tale for National Chinese food day.
-- Clear Plastic Bag
How would I decide? I love pies. All sorts of pies. If given a choice between pie and cake, I will always take the pie. Sifting through memories of flaky crusts (or maybe dutch crumbles), coconut creams and sweet-tart cherries, my decision was much easier than I had imagined. The best pie I ever had was in early September 2001 in London, England. Traveling alone, and having walked until I was exhausted, it was dark, and I was lost. A warm glow from down the street led me to a neighborhood (unknown) restaurant. Not a pint-filled pub of my colonist dream, just a (very) plain neighborhood restaurant.
There it was on the laminated menu. Apple pie. I'm always keen to not eat traditionally American food while traveling, but my blistered feet and throbbing loneliness demanded the comfort of pie.
It wasn't the crust (too thick) and it wasn't the filling (too gelatinous) and, although I did enjoy the pool of creme anglaise it was plopped on top of, it was strictly its state of pieness that makes it the best pie I've ever had.
The best Chinese food I've ever had was in Rome. But I'll save that travel tale for National Chinese food day.
-- Clear Plastic Bag
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
oh! to be a high flying and free-breathing bird
The amazing Neti Pot is for all travelers who suffer from congestion or post nasal drip upon landing in unfamiliar climates. A sinus headache can cripple even the most adventurous traveler, but we just tried jala neti - the Indian Ayurvedic practice of using a small pot for nasal irrigation by pouring warm salty water into one nostril and allowing it to drain from the other - and yes, we heard about it from Oprah. But oh boy, do we believe! Come on - don't be scared - visit http://www.sinucleanse.com/ to see a full demonstration. Once you get the hang of it, you won’t leave home without it. Of course, make sure you are somewhere that you are willing to drink the water before pouring it in your nose.
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Make a run for the border
You won't want to miss Santa Fe Steakhouse, a McAllen, Texas restaurant and bar where you'll find everyone who is anyone. But the in-crowd is not why High Flying Bird hit Santa Fe last Wednesday night while down south on business; the espresso-encrusted beef filet was.
Feast in the dining room and finish up with live music in the cantina. With reasonable prices, fantastic food and a happening bar, Sante Fe Steakhouse is almost reason enough to head to the Valley.
Santa Fe Steakhouse 1918 S 10th Street, McAllen, TX 78503 (956) 630-2331
Feast in the dining room and finish up with live music in the cantina. With reasonable prices, fantastic food and a happening bar, Sante Fe Steakhouse is almost reason enough to head to the Valley.
Santa Fe Steakhouse 1918 S 10th Street, McAllen, TX 78503 (956) 630-2331
Saturday, January 12, 2008
I'm sorry, I don't speak Hindi
High Flying Bird aims to be the go-to travel blog for everyone interested in "in-between travel," travel somewhere above the $10-a-day backpacking trip and below the $500-a-day coach-tour-guided-never-see-the-real-country trip, with an emphasis on information useful for the traveling female.
But this news tidbit from our favorite travel destination, India, is a shout out of warning particularly for our male readers.
Per a January 12 Indian court ruling, having sex with a woman after a false promise of marriage is rape. "The so called consent under a false promise to marriage is no consent at all."
The man, who had promised marriage to his female neighbor, was sentenced to 7 years.
Namaste and keep your mouth shut!
But this news tidbit from our favorite travel destination, India, is a shout out of warning particularly for our male readers.
Per a January 12 Indian court ruling, having sex with a woman after a false promise of marriage is rape. "The so called consent under a false promise to marriage is no consent at all."
The man, who had promised marriage to his female neighbor, was sentenced to 7 years.
Namaste and keep your mouth shut!
Not coming with High Flying Bird to Israel in September, Gloria?
The American Jewish Congress recently submitted to Ms. Magazine (which one would presume would be downright orgasmic about such things) this advertisement about the success of women in Israel. http://www.ajcongress.org/site/DocServer/Ms.pdf?docID=1961about.
Ms., however, rejected the ad, claiming it "will set off a firestorm" and told the AJC that Ms. "would love to have an ad from you on women's empowerment, or on reproductive freedom, but not on this."
How irrelevant can a magazine become? RIP Ms. Magazine, 1971-2008.
See the full AJC press release: http://sev.prnewswire.com/publishing-information-services/20080110/DC1130610012008-1.html
Ms., however, rejected the ad, claiming it "will set off a firestorm" and told the AJC that Ms. "would love to have an ad from you on women's empowerment, or on reproductive freedom, but not on this."
How irrelevant can a magazine become? RIP Ms. Magazine, 1971-2008.
See the full AJC press release: http://sev.prnewswire.com/publishing-information-services/20080110/DC1130610012008-1.html
Friday, January 11, 2008
More Bathroomish Travel Thoughts
There is been much brouhaha lately about the current successes and failures, respectively, of McDonalds and Starbucks. My professional I-Have-A-Degree-In-Finance-From-UT-But-Don't-Use-It analysis of the situation is thusly: McDonalds stuck its big toe in the "premium" coffee lake and is succeeding while Starbucks dove into serving food and is failing. Perhaps serving food is where Starbucks went wrong, but I think the real problem is with their bathrooms.
For anyone who has made the nerve-jangling roadtrip down I-35 from Dallas to Austin, dodging 18-wheelers and ducking concrete barriers, you can appreciate the need for a rest stop right around Waco. We specifically chose Starbucks just off the highway, not only to get a beverage, but we felt it would be a more soothing experience than, say, a McDonalds. The zombie soccer moms standing in line ahead of me were scary, but the barista was college-boy adorable and charming. I ordered a single espresso (I refused to say "solo espresso" on principle). I'm guessing not that many people order just an espresso at a Starbucks, so college-boy barista took the opportunity to discuss the taste with me and explain how they had adjusted the espresso machine for better flavor. "Fantastico!" I cried. But the dingy, filmy, "Joe Versus the Volcano"-esqye bathroom? Molto not fantastico.
All of which got me to thinking about my favorite "on the road" bathrooms. Since I now recognize that when it comes to travel, I am bathroom-obsessed, I'm sure I will have more to add to the list. But for those of you traveling in Texas, the following are my current two favorites along with the introduction of my good bathroom/bad bathroom ranking icons.
The Buc-ees in Gi
ddings, Texas (Between Austin and Houston)
A Buc-ees is similar to Stuckey's. It's a "roadside convenience store" where you can conveniently purchase both gas and a variety of nut-based candies. I can't speak to the men's bathroom, but the women's bathroom is absolutely spotless and the stalls are completely enclosed. I honestly don't know how they can maintain the bathroom the way they do, but I bet I have stopped at that Buc-ees no fewer than 50 times and not once has it disappointed.
Collin Street Bakery in Corsicana, Texas (Between Dallas and Houston)
Collin Street Bakery is "world famous" for its DeLuxe fruitcake. My mom loves fruitcake, so while living in Houston the tradition became to stop by the bakery to buy her a fruitcake on our way to her house in Dallas for Christmas. For me, when you say a loaf of red and green maraschino cherries, I say upchuck, but Collin Street Bakery not only carries other baked goods, it is home to one of the most glamorous, inviting bathrooms in road trip history. Warm tones and a stylishly comfortable loveseat welcome you to the sophisticated, marbled women's bathroom. Is this a bathroom of a fruitcake bakery in a small Texas town or a bathroom in an elegant Parisian hotel? You tell me!
Starbucks in
Waco, Texas (the one just off I-35)
The Barista? Charming and cordial. Espresso from the adjusted machine? Smooth. The bathroom? "Brain cloud".
-- Clear Plastic Bag
For anyone who has made the nerve-jangling roadtrip down I-35 from Dallas to Austin, dodging 18-wheelers and ducking concrete barriers, you can appreciate the need for a rest stop right around Waco. We specifically chose Starbucks just off the highway, not only to get a beverage, but we felt it would be a more soothing experience than, say, a McDonalds. The zombie soccer moms standing in line ahead of me were scary, but the barista was college-boy adorable and charming. I ordered a single espresso (I refused to say "solo espresso" on principle). I'm guessing not that many people order just an espresso at a Starbucks, so college-boy barista took the opportunity to discuss the taste with me and explain how they had adjusted the espresso machine for better flavor. "Fantastico!" I cried. But the dingy, filmy, "Joe Versus the Volcano"-esqye bathroom? Molto not fantastico.
All of which got me to thinking about my favorite "on the road" bathrooms. Since I now recognize that when it comes to travel, I am bathroom-obsessed, I'm sure I will have more to add to the list. But for those of you traveling in Texas, the following are my current two favorites along with the introduction of my good bathroom/bad bathroom ranking icons.
The Buc-ees in Gi
ddings, Texas (Between Austin and Houston)A Buc-ees is similar to Stuckey's. It's a "roadside convenience store" where you can conveniently purchase both gas and a variety of nut-based candies. I can't speak to the men's bathroom, but the women's bathroom is absolutely spotless and the stalls are completely enclosed. I honestly don't know how they can maintain the bathroom the way they do, but I bet I have stopped at that Buc-ees no fewer than 50 times and not once has it disappointed.
Collin Street Bakery in Corsicana, Texas (Between Dallas and Houston)
Collin Street Bakery is "world famous" for its DeLuxe fruitcake. My mom loves fruitcake, so while living in Houston the tradition became to stop by the bakery to buy her a fruitcake on our way to her house in Dallas for Christmas. For me, when you say a loaf of red and green maraschino cherries, I say upchuck, but Collin Street Bakery not only carries other baked goods, it is home to one of the most glamorous, inviting bathrooms in road trip history. Warm tones and a stylishly comfortable loveseat welcome you to the sophisticated, marbled women's bathroom. Is this a bathroom of a fruitcake bakery in a small Texas town or a bathroom in an elegant Parisian hotel? You tell me!Starbucks in
Waco, Texas (the one just off I-35)The Barista? Charming and cordial. Espresso from the adjusted machine? Smooth. The bathroom? "Brain cloud".
-- Clear Plastic Bag
Thursday, January 10, 2008
India to US: shame on you!
While we chug up more fuel with our land monstrosities and fight our neighbors to have the most expensive Mercedes, a true revolution from India: the world's cheapest car at $2500. Tata Motors Ltd unveiled its 'People's Car' (Volkswagon, anyone?) in New Delhi. The People's Car will revolutionize car ownership in India - even the middle class will be able to own a car. Where they are going to put those cars on those roads, and how a middle class father of three will learn to drive like those crazy Sikhs is another question altogether.
Sunday, January 6, 2008
High Flying Bird Episode 1 - Basics of India
Robyn Tinsley, Managing Editor of Wineskinny.com joins High Flying Bird for a discussion of the basics of the first trip to India. From where to go to whether to get shots, all the fundamentals are here. If you want to experience something in between the backpacking trip and the air-conditioned group tour, this podcast is for you.
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
Haiku For You (HFY)
Here is a special vacation-themed HFY to get your 2008 started out right.
2007
Scottsdale and Vegas
Eureka Springs what will year
2008 bring?
Holidays
After New Years Day
it's all over until the
day Memorial
Coping
Back to work new year
in a funk so I will start
dreaming of vaycay
Haiku Hannah
2007
Scottsdale and Vegas
Eureka Springs what will year
2008 bring?
Holidays
After New Years Day
it's all over until the
day Memorial
Coping
Back to work new year
in a funk so I will start
dreaming of vaycay
Haiku Hannah
Monday, December 31, 2007
Travel Privacy Tip: Strategies for the Vented Louver Bathroom Door
An ex loved to stay at the Fairmont Miramar in Santa Monica. The hotel is certainly gorgeous but -- and, perhaps, I am overly self-conscious -- beware the vented louver bathroom doors.
What is a vented louver door? Here is a definition from door dealer site: "Vented louver doors permit air flow and passage, making them ideal for applications like closets and laundry rooms where ventilation is preferred. This promotes some visibility through the door on the non-blind side."
Yes, ideal for applications like closets and laundry rooms, but not so much for posh hotel rooms presumably created to set romantic moods. All the fluffy down comforters and ocean views will not disguise the personal business being conducted in the bathroom. What to do in this travel situation?
You have a couple of strategies in the vented louver bathroom bathroom door quandary:
The Hotel Lobby Bathroom Approach: This strategy is 100% effective and can completely avoid an open and honest discussion of the vented louver bathroom door situation. However, it is often difficult to implement without potentially uncomfortable and probing questions and/or if you have had far too much to drink the night before and distance to the bathroom is an issue.
The "God Save the Queen" Tactic (Plus Perfume Blast Supplement): Ultimately, after several stays at the Miramar, this became my chosen strategy. I couldn't come up with any new reasons as to why I needed to leave the room and, with the truth-inducing services of too much wine, I explained my discomfort with the vented louver bathroom doors. It was thusly agreed that whenever one of us was in the bathroom, the other would remain on the far side of the room while both singing (rather loudly) "God Save the Queen". Success with this tactic is not dependent on "God Save the Queen", per se. Entirely song optional. Perfume Blast Supplement should be self-explanatory.
Unfortunately, the "God Save the Queen" tactic was only implemented a few more times as I was unceremoniously, errr, dumped a short time later (as foreshadowed in the beginning of this entry). However, I do not attribute the break-up to the vented louver bathroom tactic.
-- Clear Plastic Bag
What is a vented louver door? Here is a definition from door dealer site: "Vented louver doors permit air flow and passage, making them ideal for applications like closets and laundry rooms where ventilation is preferred. This promotes some visibility through the door on the non-blind side."
Yes, ideal for applications like closets and laundry rooms, but not so much for posh hotel rooms presumably created to set romantic moods. All the fluffy down comforters and ocean views will not disguise the personal business being conducted in the bathroom. What to do in this travel situation?
You have a couple of strategies in the vented louver bathroom bathroom door quandary:
The Hotel Lobby Bathroom Approach: This strategy is 100% effective and can completely avoid an open and honest discussion of the vented louver bathroom door situation. However, it is often difficult to implement without potentially uncomfortable and probing questions and/or if you have had far too much to drink the night before and distance to the bathroom is an issue.
The "God Save the Queen" Tactic (Plus Perfume Blast Supplement): Ultimately, after several stays at the Miramar, this became my chosen strategy. I couldn't come up with any new reasons as to why I needed to leave the room and, with the truth-inducing services of too much wine, I explained my discomfort with the vented louver bathroom doors. It was thusly agreed that whenever one of us was in the bathroom, the other would remain on the far side of the room while both singing (rather loudly) "God Save the Queen". Success with this tactic is not dependent on "God Save the Queen", per se. Entirely song optional. Perfume Blast Supplement should be self-explanatory.
Unfortunately, the "God Save the Queen" tactic was only implemented a few more times as I was unceremoniously, errr, dumped a short time later (as foreshadowed in the beginning of this entry). However, I do not attribute the break-up to the vented louver bathroom tactic.
-- Clear Plastic Bag
haiku for you
"Job - The Reason We Travel"
Two thousand and eight
another year in a cube
working for the dude
--- Travel Monkey Julie
Two thousand and eight
another year in a cube
working for the dude
--- Travel Monkey Julie
Travel Monkey Kim is on board and previewing her travel future posts
The travel blog has great possibilities. I can certainly step up with an oldie but a goodie -- Gatlinburg, TN -- mountains, hot tubs, and bears oh my.
In the alternative, I am quite sure there are single gals everywhere who want to know whether to stay in The Hampton Inn, The Holiday Inn, The Quality Inn, The Comfort Inn etc. in Canton, MS. It's so darn hard to choose when they are all right there in a row. Decisions, decisions. The key is knowing which one is closest to the Western Sizziln.
A quick look into the future (but never too far) reveals a travel adventure to Chatanooga in January for a bed & breakfast weekend get away with the Boyfriend. He grew up there and wants me to "see his old haunts" and "meet his brother and some old friends." Let's not start asking why or we will be here all day pondering the weirdness of men. I expect to come away with all sorts of tips for the unwary gal traveler and with relationship disasters one right after another. I am envisioning "Real Travel with the Boyfriend: The Non-Romantic Side of the Bed and Breakfast World." The only thing that concerns me is the directive from the Bed and Breakfast that we cannot, under any circumstances, have the following in our suite -- red wine, rose petals, candles. Well, what the hell are we gonna do, now I ask you?
Or I may write up the travel to Arkansas by 10 hour car. That whole painting lines in the road in the backwoods of the Ozarks while millions of cars back up for days and days should make for fine tell'n as well as our trip down the road from hell. The whole experience cries out for a sermon on the evils of Mapquest. Oh, and then there was stopping at the church to figure out where in the hell we were only to have another car pull in behind us driven by a lone white male in his thirties (as most serial killers are). I believe Travel Monkety Julie inquired, "What is he doing?" and I replied, "He is going to kill us."
I must, of course, give directions for how to get to the hotel in Eureka Springs. You take a left, and a right, and another right, you put your left leg in, you do the hokey pokey and you turn yourself around . . . that's what it's all about.
Suffice it to say, I see prime read'n and writ'n coming at you from the far and near corners of the world. Ladies - join me.
Travel Monkey Kim
In the alternative, I am quite sure there are single gals everywhere who want to know whether to stay in The Hampton Inn, The Holiday Inn, The Quality Inn, The Comfort Inn etc. in Canton, MS. It's so darn hard to choose when they are all right there in a row. Decisions, decisions. The key is knowing which one is closest to the Western Sizziln.
A quick look into the future (but never too far) reveals a travel adventure to Chatanooga in January for a bed & breakfast weekend get away with the Boyfriend. He grew up there and wants me to "see his old haunts" and "meet his brother and some old friends." Let's not start asking why or we will be here all day pondering the weirdness of men. I expect to come away with all sorts of tips for the unwary gal traveler and with relationship disasters one right after another. I am envisioning "Real Travel with the Boyfriend: The Non-Romantic Side of the Bed and Breakfast World." The only thing that concerns me is the directive from the Bed and Breakfast that we cannot, under any circumstances, have the following in our suite -- red wine, rose petals, candles. Well, what the hell are we gonna do, now I ask you?
Or I may write up the travel to Arkansas by 10 hour car. That whole painting lines in the road in the backwoods of the Ozarks while millions of cars back up for days and days should make for fine tell'n as well as our trip down the road from hell. The whole experience cries out for a sermon on the evils of Mapquest. Oh, and then there was stopping at the church to figure out where in the hell we were only to have another car pull in behind us driven by a lone white male in his thirties (as most serial killers are). I believe Travel Monkety Julie inquired, "What is he doing?" and I replied, "He is going to kill us."
I must, of course, give directions for how to get to the hotel in Eureka Springs. You take a left, and a right, and another right, you put your left leg in, you do the hokey pokey and you turn yourself around . . . that's what it's all about.
Suffice it to say, I see prime read'n and writ'n coming at you from the far and near corners of the world. Ladies - join me.
Travel Monkey Kim
Friday, December 21, 2007
note to men with rottweilers
why are rottweilers and pit bulls the only dogs who are walked without leashes? yorkie? leash. chihuahua? leash. lab? check. only men with rottweilers and pit bulls hit the road leash-less. hey dude - feeling a little weak, feminine, damsel-in-distress-esque? buy a pit bull and no one will know! your insecurities are showing (and drooling); do us a favor and at least get them on a leash.
Monday, December 17, 2007
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